As we pack up our house on Lancey Street in preparation for our move to Moosehead Lake, I am finding all kinds of things in boxes as we sift and sort. I came across this Mother’s Day card from my Riley a couple weeks ago. Joy and Grief immediately began to battle it out. JOY whispering compassionately that there was such tenderness in Riley’s heart and that I need to remember his sweetness. GRIEF flauntingly reminding me that I will never again receive a Mother’s Day card from Ry, or a card of any kind, let alone a hug or see his smile beyond those which reside in memory and in pictures. GRIEF – the coward – rarely travels alone, often brings REMORSE as his preferred companion. The message in this card particularly poignant, and foreshadowing as much of his life was.
Everything is still very raw. I keep telling myself it hasn’t even been two years. I hope that someday when I find treasures like this, that my mind gently embraces the gift. There was such tenderness in his heart. I miss him every day.